Jennifer K Dick
From CERN 200
a manuscript in progress
CERN 3
I dreamt that I had always been an architect and now everyone was on a pilgrimage to admire my newest design which I called the Solenoid. It exploded upon entry. Everyone loved it.
CERN 4
I dreamt that protons and neutrons were tiny cosmic figures whose bodies only had outlines and no details. They were making love on a Swiss porch. I knew it was Swiss because of the giant red and white cross flag waving above them like a warning or skewed version of a call for ambulance care. Something about this recalled WWI. “I have always struck gold,” the neutron whispered in the proton’s ear.
CERN 5
I dreamt that the beam really did make two black holes. They started off small. No one, not even I, could see them. But as they grew it seemed like an Yves Klein figure was writhing in their center, all cobalt. When we noticed them in the corner, already the size of pears, then, only an hour later, the size of a rugby ball, I got down on one knee and proposed to Angelina Jolie. She said “Yes, yes!” right there and then abandoning the kids, Brad, the film industry and the whole nine yards. But when I saw a tear slip out from under Brad’s cool slick sunglasses and start carving a rivulet onto his bronzed cheek, I knew I had to sacrifice myself, to let her go, so I dashed straight towards one of the brand new black holes which, by then, was the size of a doorway. Perfect.
CERN 6
I dreamt the Higgs boson had accidentally been named bosom. No one seemed to remember that bosom had been a word at another time with a real meaning. I giggled at every science fair, conference, Nobel lecture, as lab coat wearing men, balding and with bad overlarge glasses, explained the “Higgs bosom had been found” announced that the “Higgs bosom had special bits” and the “Higgs bosom was a breakthrough.” Soon, the head of CERN called me into his office to inform me that I was going to have to be let go after I had embarrassed the group with my uncontrolled laughter at the most recent conference on—and I quote—“The amazing scope of the Higgs bosom”.
CERN 7
I dreamt that I was fucking a proton beam ray as Superman looked on. He gave me a “ride’em cowboy” and I gave him a sassy Dolly Pardon wink even his cock will never forget.
CERN 8
I dreamt that I was cradled in the downy arms of all the energy that had ever been trapped in the cylindrical tube of CERN. As the particle collider revved up, I held out my hands and arms and they were transfigured into a color-glass condensate which behaved like a wave of gluons.
CERN 9
I dreamt I was back at MHC failing to learn to blow smoke rings, the packets of Marlboro lights stacked up by my mattress which I had taken off the university bedsprings and flopped down on the floor. It was Jimmy Hendrix’s birthday and Tiff hung her massive speakers out her windows and blasted the campus with guitar riffs. Time then folded in upon itself, looped, infinitely e and o. I dreamt I was back at MHC failing to learn.
[1] MHC is Mount Holyoke College.
CERN 10
I dreamt that three billion years after Earth ceased to exist it started up again like an old engine. Everyone that had been came back. It was like Wovoka’s original ghost dance—the buffalo and the ancestors. We all began to walk in the same direction, but then we came to the sea and could walk no more. We looked out and when the sun set and it was black we witnessed bright orange and red lava spitting high into the night and drizzling down the sides of volcanic islands. It is then we began to swim.
CERN 23
I dreamt someone at CERN had committed a quantum murder—it was a stabbing, a shooting, a poisoning. Stubborn and in denial of fluctuating realities, I demanded to know whether the victim had died of blunt force trauma. Was there petechial hemorrhaging? I got out my magnifying glass, strapped a miner’s light to my head and leaned in to peer into the victim’s eyes, but there was no one there.
CERN 53
I dreamt that a CERN physicist trapped a supernova in a jar. It was quite lovely and everyone on earth wanted to see it in person. A global pilgrimage towards the Swiss borders began, overwhelming natural resources in the regions surrounding CERN, outstripping shelter then food supplies. People were camped out in every cul de sac, under bridges and in dry tunnels, along roads and eventually even on roads when the traffic backed up to a standstill. Trucks couldn’t get through and soon enough chaos ensued as droves of migrants stampeded towards the enclosed supernova in hopes of seeing the light. So many people from every corner of the earth came to surround and enshroud the landscape around the Swiss-French border that eventually their weight began to alter the gravitational field of the planet itself. Things were literally spinning out of control and despite televised warnings to stay away, the sun itself could have no greater pull. Before long, 99% of the earth was uninhabited and even the Swiss national guard crumbled under the rush to bear witness to this fabulously unexpected trapped beacon of dying hope.
CERN 2
I dreamt I was late to my interview with the particle beam sanitation board. What wouldn’t I give for a good broom and a long tunnel? The roads were vast and stretched like taffy so the faster I drove the farther I was from my destination. Then there might have been a large crack. A strike of electric energy. Anyway, I spilt my coffee and when I leaned down to pick up my travel mug my glasses slipped off my nose onto the car mat and before I could sit back up I’d smashed into a bus. Guess the job is someone else’s.
CERN 24
I dreamt an alarm went off in a town above the particle collider. Miles below, a mole panicked, began to gnaw and tunnel away from the shrieking sound. Super-strength producing endorphins and adrenaline gave him the force to chew through concrete and steel, but when he hit the Hadron collider tube it was in use and WHOOSH!
CERN 25
I dreamt that all time began to flow backwards. Even our actions reversed, our nights, days. We were born before anyone’d copulated. The kiss came after.
CERN 27
I dreamt that CERN decided to put on the “Best Laser Show Party Ever”. CNN, BBC and Al-Jazeera were prepped for live coverage. TV screens glowed in homes around the globe. But then some grunt down in the generator room accidentally cut the power. Everyone in the world was on standby—the news outlets, the internet geeks. Just then, a toddler got ahold of a pocket laser and flashed a red dot up into a pine tree. Everyone went, “Ohhh! Ahhh!”
I dreamt that I had always been an architect and now everyone was on a pilgrimage to admire my newest design which I called the Solenoid. It exploded upon entry. Everyone loved it.
CERN 4
I dreamt that protons and neutrons were tiny cosmic figures whose bodies only had outlines and no details. They were making love on a Swiss porch. I knew it was Swiss because of the giant red and white cross flag waving above them like a warning or skewed version of a call for ambulance care. Something about this recalled WWI. “I have always struck gold,” the neutron whispered in the proton’s ear.
CERN 5
I dreamt that the beam really did make two black holes. They started off small. No one, not even I, could see them. But as they grew it seemed like an Yves Klein figure was writhing in their center, all cobalt. When we noticed them in the corner, already the size of pears, then, only an hour later, the size of a rugby ball, I got down on one knee and proposed to Angelina Jolie. She said “Yes, yes!” right there and then abandoning the kids, Brad, the film industry and the whole nine yards. But when I saw a tear slip out from under Brad’s cool slick sunglasses and start carving a rivulet onto his bronzed cheek, I knew I had to sacrifice myself, to let her go, so I dashed straight towards one of the brand new black holes which, by then, was the size of a doorway. Perfect.
CERN 6
I dreamt the Higgs boson had accidentally been named bosom. No one seemed to remember that bosom had been a word at another time with a real meaning. I giggled at every science fair, conference, Nobel lecture, as lab coat wearing men, balding and with bad overlarge glasses, explained the “Higgs bosom had been found” announced that the “Higgs bosom had special bits” and the “Higgs bosom was a breakthrough.” Soon, the head of CERN called me into his office to inform me that I was going to have to be let go after I had embarrassed the group with my uncontrolled laughter at the most recent conference on—and I quote—“The amazing scope of the Higgs bosom”.
CERN 7
I dreamt that I was fucking a proton beam ray as Superman looked on. He gave me a “ride’em cowboy” and I gave him a sassy Dolly Pardon wink even his cock will never forget.
CERN 8
I dreamt that I was cradled in the downy arms of all the energy that had ever been trapped in the cylindrical tube of CERN. As the particle collider revved up, I held out my hands and arms and they were transfigured into a color-glass condensate which behaved like a wave of gluons.
CERN 9
I dreamt I was back at MHC failing to learn to blow smoke rings, the packets of Marlboro lights stacked up by my mattress which I had taken off the university bedsprings and flopped down on the floor. It was Jimmy Hendrix’s birthday and Tiff hung her massive speakers out her windows and blasted the campus with guitar riffs. Time then folded in upon itself, looped, infinitely e and o. I dreamt I was back at MHC failing to learn.
[1] MHC is Mount Holyoke College.
CERN 10
I dreamt that three billion years after Earth ceased to exist it started up again like an old engine. Everyone that had been came back. It was like Wovoka’s original ghost dance—the buffalo and the ancestors. We all began to walk in the same direction, but then we came to the sea and could walk no more. We looked out and when the sun set and it was black we witnessed bright orange and red lava spitting high into the night and drizzling down the sides of volcanic islands. It is then we began to swim.
CERN 23
I dreamt someone at CERN had committed a quantum murder—it was a stabbing, a shooting, a poisoning. Stubborn and in denial of fluctuating realities, I demanded to know whether the victim had died of blunt force trauma. Was there petechial hemorrhaging? I got out my magnifying glass, strapped a miner’s light to my head and leaned in to peer into the victim’s eyes, but there was no one there.
CERN 53
I dreamt that a CERN physicist trapped a supernova in a jar. It was quite lovely and everyone on earth wanted to see it in person. A global pilgrimage towards the Swiss borders began, overwhelming natural resources in the regions surrounding CERN, outstripping shelter then food supplies. People were camped out in every cul de sac, under bridges and in dry tunnels, along roads and eventually even on roads when the traffic backed up to a standstill. Trucks couldn’t get through and soon enough chaos ensued as droves of migrants stampeded towards the enclosed supernova in hopes of seeing the light. So many people from every corner of the earth came to surround and enshroud the landscape around the Swiss-French border that eventually their weight began to alter the gravitational field of the planet itself. Things were literally spinning out of control and despite televised warnings to stay away, the sun itself could have no greater pull. Before long, 99% of the earth was uninhabited and even the Swiss national guard crumbled under the rush to bear witness to this fabulously unexpected trapped beacon of dying hope.
CERN 2
I dreamt I was late to my interview with the particle beam sanitation board. What wouldn’t I give for a good broom and a long tunnel? The roads were vast and stretched like taffy so the faster I drove the farther I was from my destination. Then there might have been a large crack. A strike of electric energy. Anyway, I spilt my coffee and when I leaned down to pick up my travel mug my glasses slipped off my nose onto the car mat and before I could sit back up I’d smashed into a bus. Guess the job is someone else’s.
CERN 24
I dreamt an alarm went off in a town above the particle collider. Miles below, a mole panicked, began to gnaw and tunnel away from the shrieking sound. Super-strength producing endorphins and adrenaline gave him the force to chew through concrete and steel, but when he hit the Hadron collider tube it was in use and WHOOSH!
CERN 25
I dreamt that all time began to flow backwards. Even our actions reversed, our nights, days. We were born before anyone’d copulated. The kiss came after.
CERN 27
I dreamt that CERN decided to put on the “Best Laser Show Party Ever”. CNN, BBC and Al-Jazeera were prepped for live coverage. TV screens glowed in homes around the globe. But then some grunt down in the generator room accidentally cut the power. Everyone in the world was on standby—the news outlets, the internet geeks. Just then, a toddler got ahold of a pocket laser and flashed a red dot up into a pine tree. Everyone went, “Ohhh! Ahhh!”
Copyright Jennifer K Dick 2014
These poems are after the mobile image and post, which can be visited for full visual effect: http://the-science-llama.tumblr.com/post/45353550258/particle-collisions-could-create-twin-black as well as 16 Poems by Roberto Bolaño, translated by Laura Healy, published on the BOMB magazine website at http://bombsite.com/issues/999/articles/4864, LHC's Latest Particle Collisions Find What May Be A New Form Of Matter: Particle collisions are turning up unexpected quantum weirdness by Rebecca Boyle, http://www.popsci.com/science/article/2012-11/lhcs-latest-particle-collisions-find-some-unexpected-quantum-weirdness plus a little skim-visit to Albert Einstein and the Fabric of Time by Gevin Giobran at http://everythingforever.com/einstein.htm
These poems are after the mobile image and post, which can be visited for full visual effect: http://the-science-llama.tumblr.com/post/45353550258/particle-collisions-could-create-twin-black as well as 16 Poems by Roberto Bolaño, translated by Laura Healy, published on the BOMB magazine website at http://bombsite.com/issues/999/articles/4864, LHC's Latest Particle Collisions Find What May Be A New Form Of Matter: Particle collisions are turning up unexpected quantum weirdness by Rebecca Boyle, http://www.popsci.com/science/article/2012-11/lhcs-latest-particle-collisions-find-some-unexpected-quantum-weirdness plus a little skim-visit to Albert Einstein and the Fabric of Time by Gevin Giobran at http://everythingforever.com/einstein.htm
Jennifer K Dick is a writer, professor at UHA and translator who lives in Mulhouse, France. She is the author of CIRCUITS (Corrupt, 2013), ENCLOSURES (BlazeVox eBook, 2007), FLUORESCENCE (University of GA Press, 2004), and 4 chapbooks, including CONVERSION (2013) with Estepa editions, Paris including art by Kate Van Houten. She co-curates the Ivy Writers reading series in Paris and the Ecrire L'Art mini-residency at La Kunsthalle Mulhouse. She is a poetry editor for VERSAL out of Amsterdam, writes book reviews for Drunken Boat and a poetics column for Tears in the Fence (UK). Her blog is at http://jenniferkdick.blogspot.fr where you can find links to recent poems and other tidbits.
